Life-long Discipleship: Counting the Cost
- Mar 8
- 8 min read
This is what we mean by cheap grace, the grace which amounts to the justification of sin without the justification of the repentant sinner who departs from sin and from whom sin departs... Costly grace is the gospel which must be sought again and again, the gift which must be asked for, the door at which a man must knock. Such grace is costly because it calls us to follow, and it is grace because it calls us to follow Jesus Christ. It is costly because it costs a man His life, and it is grace because it gives a man the only true life. It is costly because it condemns sin and grace because it justifies the sinner. Above all it is costly because it cost God the life of His Son and it is grace because God did not reckon His Son too dear a price to pay for our life. – Dietrich Bonhoeffer
For many of us, the most important and joyful events in life take place around the table. Holidays revolve around meals, and life’s great milestones—weddings, birthdays, graduations, and celebrations—are often marked by gathering together to eat and rejoice.
Even the Lord’s Supper, where we remember the saving work of Christ and His covenant with His people, is a celebration of God’s people sharing a meal together.
It is striking, then, that Jesus begins this passage by comparing the kingdom of God to a man preparing a great banquet. This reveals something significant about the heart of God. He is a God who loves to celebrate and who delights in inviting others to share in His joy.
In many ways, the kingdom of God is like a great celebration that the Lord of the universe has been preparing since the beginning of creation—a feast of life, joy, and fellowship with Him. All our own celebrations are only faint rehearsals for the true feast that will take place when God brings His kingdom to its fullness.
Just imagine what kind of celebration is possible when it is hosted by the One who possesses all resources, all time, and infinite creativity.
Jesus repeatedly teaches that the kingdom of God is the greatest treasure imaginable. On one occasion He compared it to a pearl of such great value that a person would sell everything they owned in order to obtain it (Matthew 13:45–46).
The message is clear: once someone truly sees the worth of the kingdom of God, there is nothing they would not give in order to enter it.
Many people need to replace their distorted images of God as a stern boss, a grumpy old man, or a cosmic killjoy with the picture Jesus gives us. The God of the Bible is a God who celebrates and who calls His people into joy. His kingdom is not a place of sterile rules and lifeless rituals, but the place where the deepest and most lasting celebration takes place.
Until we believe this, the call of Jesus in this passage will make little sense to us. But once we begin to see the kingdom for what it truly is, all other ways of living begin to look strangely shallow.
Lame Excuses
In my many years of working with students, I think I have heard just about every excuse for why someone couldn’t attend an event. I have heard everything from “it was cold outside” to “my rabbit was sick.” Once, a student told me she could not come to our Bible study because she needed to spend all her time studying for upcoming exams. The next day she posted online that she was enjoying a movie and coffee with friends at the mall.
Most of us have done something similar at some point. When we do not truly want to go somewhere or do something, excuses are rarely hard to find.
Jesus’ story about the great banquet could almost be called the story of the lame excuses. In the parable, a great feast has been prepared and many have already said they would attend. But when the time comes, the servant hears one excuse after another. One person says he must inspect a newly purchased field. Another explains that he must test his new oxen. A third says he cannot come because he has recently married.
None of these things are inherently wrong. But they reveal something deeper about how these people viewed the banquet and the host. If they truly believed the feast would be worth their time, they could easily have examined the field later, worked the oxen another day, or even brought their wife with them. Their excuses reveal what mattered most to them.
The host recognizes immediately that these are not sincere obstacles but misplaced priorities. Instead of pleading with them to reconsider, he sends his servants to invite others—people who will gladly come and share in the celebration.
The message of the parable is clear. The kingdom of God has arrived, and Jesus invites us to follow Him. Yet many people, captivated by other concerns and ambitions, refuse the invitation.
Our excuses often reveal what we truly believe about Jesus and where our priorities actually lie.
The Hardest Passage
Jesus was on His way to Jerusalem, where He would suffer many things and be rejected by the elders, the chief priests, and the teachers of the law. As He traveled, large crowds gathered around Him. At one point He turned to address them and explained what it truly means to be His disciple.
In simple terms, discipleship is possible only for those who are willing to give everything in order to follow Jesus. To be His disciple is to give Him complete devotion and allegiance. It means allowing our lives to be shaped by His teaching, His character, and His way.
There are not different levels or degrees of discipleship from which we can choose. Jesus simply calls people to follow Him. To be His disciple is to love, worship, and obey Him without letting anything else take His place. This commitment touches every area of life—our possessions, our ambitions, our relationships, our plans, and even our own lives.
This is what Jesus means when He says that anyone who follows Him must “hate” their father and mother, their wife and children, and even their own life. In a culture where loyalty to family was considered one of the highest obligations, these words would have sounded shocking and extreme. But that was precisely the point. Jesus was forcing the crowd to confront the true cost of discipleship.
In comparison to our devotion to Christ, every other allegiance must come second. In all areas of life, without exception, Jesus must be Lord.
These words are difficult for us to hear. We are often drawn instead to what Dietrich Bonhoeffer called “cheap grace”—a grace that offers forgiveness but asks little of us in return. Yet Jesus speaks of a different kind of grace. He calls us to follow Him, and this call involves the surrender of our whole lives.
This is why Jesus urges the crowd to count the cost before deciding to follow Him. It would be foolish to begin the journey of discipleship only to turn back later because the road proved harder than expected. So He speaks plainly. If someone is not willing to give everything for Him, they cannot truly be His disciple.
Many people today call themselves Christians but have never seriously considered this call. Jesus becomes something we add to our lives when it is convenient rather than the Lord to whom our lives belong.
But the invitation of Jesus has always been the same. To follow Him is to surrender everything—and to discover that in doing so we find the only life that truly matters.
The way of the Cross
When we read Jesus’ words about taking up our cross, we are often tempted to soften them. We may speak of everyday inconveniences or personal struggles as “our cross to bear.” But for the people who first heard Jesus say these words, the meaning would have been far more disturbing.
The cross was an instrument of torture and death reserved for the worst criminals and enemies of the Roman Empire. Those condemned to crucifixion were marched through the streets in humiliation, mocked and rejected, before being left to die slowly in public view. It was not only painful—it was profoundly shameful.
So when Jesus told His followers that they must take up their cross to follow Him, they would have pictured a life marked by rejection, suffering, and death.
Jesus’ invitation to discipleship is therefore one of complete devotion and radical allegiance. To deny ourselves means more than giving up a few desires or adjusting our plans. It means renouncing the supposed right to rule our own lives and allowing Jesus to lead us instead.
When Jesus spoke these words, He Himself was on His way to Jerusalem, where He would be rejected and killed. To follow Him meant walking the same road—the road of surrender, sacrifice, and faithfulness.
Even today, following Jesus often means living in ways that the world finds strange or foolish. Those who bear His name may be misunderstood, mocked, or rejected for choosing His way of love, humility, and obedience.
Yet the story does not end with the cross. The good news of Easter is that Jesus was raised from the dead. His life of radical trust in the Father and His complete surrender to the Father’s will did not end in defeat but in resurrection.
This is the great reversal at the heart of the gospel. The world believes that life is found in self-preservation, power, and approval. But the resurrection of Jesus reveals a different truth: true life is found only when we entrust ourselves completely to the Giver of life.
When we die to ourselves, we discover that we have not lost life at all—we have finally found it.
A Discipleship Plan
Discipleship does not happen by accident. No one wakes up one day having loved the world the night before and suddenly finds themselves fully formed into the likeness of Christ. Like every meaningful pursuit in life, discipleship requires intention and thoughtful commitment.
Jesus Himself illustrates this point with two brief pictures. He asks us to imagine a person who wants to build a tower. No wise builder begins construction without first considering the cost and making a plan to finish the work. Otherwise the foundation will be laid, but the project will remain unfinished, and everyone who sees it will mock the builder.
In the same way, a king does not go to war against a powerful enemy without first carefully considering whether he has the strength and strategy needed for the battle. He weighs the situation, considers his resources, and determines the path forward.
These simple examples reveal something important about the life of discipleship. Following Jesus is not a casual decision or a temporary enthusiasm. It is a life that must be entered thoughtfully and pursued intentionally.
In every area of life we naturally plan for what matters to us. We plan our education, our work, our marriages, and our future. Yet strangely, many people give little thought to how they will grow as disciples of Jesus.
But if discipleship truly means learning to live as Jesus lived, then it requires a life oriented toward Him. It means cultivating habits that help us remain close to Him—listening to His voice in Scripture, learning to pray, sharing life with His people, and serving others in love.
Discipleship is not a moment but a way of life. It unfolds over years of following Jesus, trusting Him, and allowing Him to shape our hearts and desires.
And as we continue to walk this path, we discover again and again that the life Jesus calls us to is not the loss of joy, but the discovery of it.
Discipleship is not the loss of life but the joyful surrender of everything to the King whose kingdom is worth more than all we possess.
